I don’t know about you, but stress gets the best of me more often than I care to admit.
Stress can get the best of you while planning a wedding, raising your first (and then maybe your second and third) child, starting a new job, going through a break-up, college, buying a house (especially in this market!)… the list goes on. Stress is a part of our lives, and we can either choose to ignore and suppress it until it rears its ugly head, or we can face it, breathe it in and be the boss of our reality.
Owning my own business, I have chosen to surround myself with like-minded people who can offer input, advice and understanding to help me manage my stress. One of those people is my good friend Gina Zappariello of Pathfinder Coaching: today she is going to break down four easy ways for us to de-stress. Thanks Gina!
“She had finally allowed her negative feelings to surface, feelings that had been repressed for years in her soul. She had actually FELT them, and they were no longer necessary, they could leave.” Paulo Coelho
How many times have you shut out the feelings you are having when you are under stress, believing that if you just ignore the feelings they will eventually go away? How often is that method successful?
For many of us, we have learned over the years to suppress our negative feelings, and not fully experience them, believing they were bad for us. In doing so, we are merely putting them aside briefly, but we’re never really getting rid of them.
All feelings, whether positive or negative, have validity and should be experienced. From experience comes learning. From learning comes growth. It’s how we handle the negative feelings that will have a detrimental effect on us.
The next time you are feeling stressed, try these 4 Easy Steps to De-Stress. The more you practice these steps, the more they will become a natural part of your life.
Step 1:
BREATHE. When you feel that tightness in your chest, neck, shoulders, etc. that comes with stress, pause and take in a deep breath through your nose counting to 5 slowly and let it out through your mouth, counting to 5 slowly. Try to fill your lungs to capacity each time, and feel your stomach extend. Do this 3 times.
Step 2:
NOTICE. Without judgment, notice and name what it is that is causing your negative feelings. You could feel stress, guilt, overwhelmed, angry, anxious. Just be aware of it. Don’t try to explain it. Simply say to yourself: “I’m feeling _______.” Say it out loud.
Step 3:
AFFIRM. Again out loud, affirm yourself with an affirmative statement or mantra. Make one up yourself or use one of the following statements:
“I am doing the best I can.”
“I can handle this feeling and manage my day.”
“This feeling of _____ will soon pass.”
“I am safe and I am loved. I can handle whatever I am feeling.”
“I love myself. I will take care of this feeling later on today.”
Steps 1-3 help you notice what you are feeling without judgment, and be present so you can move through your day in a calmer frame of mind. However, as I previously stated, there may be a powerful learning in the stress or difficult feeling that you might want to explore. So therefore, I recommend moving to Step 4, even if it is later on in the day. This step proves you can take care of yourself, and as you get better at it, your stressful or difficult feelings will become easier to handle.
Step 4:
REFLECT AND LEARN: for this step, find a time where you can reflect on your feelings uninterrupted. It may only be a few minutes, but it should be in a quiet place free of distractions. Consider:
What is important about the feeling of _____ that you had today?
And
What do you need to learn from it?
Avoiding our unpleasant feelings and stress may help us get through a difficult day or week, but it can be a destructive habit which actually increases our stress in the long run. Our feelings show us who we are – and when we avoid looking at what we feel we literally abandon our ‘selves’ – removing the ability to learn what our feelings are telling us. When we allow our feelings and look at them without judgement, we not only learn from them but we also find that our feelings ‘move on’ – because we’ve got the message – and they’re not needed any more.
About the Guest
Professional Coach, Experienced Educator and Transformational Leader.
I coach people who are struggling to move past personal and professional obstacles and move toward LIFE: Living In Full Empowerment.
*Interested in working with Gina? Here’s how to get in touch with her!
Website: pathfinder-coaching.com (PS I did her head shots!)
Book Coaching Sessions Online: http://pathfindercoaching.genbook.com/
Coaching Referral Service: www.noomii.com/users/gina-zappariello
Skype: coachginaz
Cell: 415-902-4977
“Acupuncture is a collection of procedures involving penetration of the skin with needles to stimulate certain points on the body. In its classical form it is a characteristic component of traditional Chinese medicine (TCM), a form of alternative medicine, and one of the oldest healing practices in the world. According to traditional Chinese medicine, stimulating specific acupuncture points corrects imbalances in the flow of qi through channels known as meridians. Scientific investigation has not found any histological or physiological correlates for traditional Chinese concepts such as qi, meridians, and acupuncture points, and some contemporary practitioners use acupuncture without following the traditional Chinese approach.” -Wikipedia
I have always been intrigued by acupuncture, and I wish I hadn’t waited 30 years to try it because it has changed my life! When I met Denise about a year ago, I was in serious pain; my right shoulder, arm, and wrist had to be in a brace most of the time, and I was losing feeling and strength in my hand. Needless to say I was in trouble… a photographer who can’t use her shooting hand/arm or a computer due to pain isn’t going to be very good at her job. So, when I met my acupuncturist Denise at the networking group we are part of and felt her calm, caregiving energy, I knew it was time to try it. I was blown away after the first session! I was beginning to think I would need surgery for my carpel tunnel syndrome, but instead I started seeing Denise regularly, and within weeks I was back to 100%. AMAZING!!! I can’t say enough wonderful things about her: she is my go-to person whenever I start feeling pain, and 90% of the time she can make it go away.
In her post, Denise is gonna talk specifically about acupuncture during pregnancy. I know that when the day comes that we choose to have children, Denise will be play a huge role in my pregnancy.
Thank you for changing my life!!!
P.S. Did you know that in Chinese medicine they can tell your current general health just by looking at your tongue…AMAZING!!!!
Acupuncture in pregnancy
by: Denise Cicuto
Is acupuncture safe during pregnancy?
Yes. Licensed acupuncturists are trained to know what acupuncture points and herbs are safe to do and which should be avoided during pregnancy.
What about fertility? Can acupuncture help me get pregnant?
Yes. Acupuncture alone or combined with In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) treatments can help women get pregnant. Once you are pregnant, regular acupuncture sessions can help make sure you have a healthy pregnancy.
What other conditions can acupuncture help with during pregnancy?
Acupuncture can help with conditions such as morning sickness, back pain, premature cervical ripening, preeclampsia (pregnancy-induced hypertension), fatigue, heartburn, constipation and gestational diabetes.
When it’s almost time for the baby to make his or her appearance in the world, acupuncture can help prepare the mom for labor and delivery. Some acupuncturists are available to do acupuncture or acupressure in the delivery room (depending on whether it’s allowed in the hospital).
What about care after pregnancy?
Acupuncture as after-care for new moms is really important. Fatigue and depression are two of the common things that happen after delivery. Regular acupuncture and moxibustion are great to help moms recover and get stronger. Some acupuncturists make house calls for women during the first month after pregnancy.
Denise Cicuto is a Licensed Acupuncturist and Chinese Herbalist specializing in Women’s Health and in Immunity. She has offices in San Francisco’s Richmond district and in the East Bay on Alameda.
www.cicutoacupuncture.com
415.404.6109
Cheers to your happy, healthy pregnancy!!!!
Love, Best Friends, Meant to be, Family, Siblings, Delicious Cake, Church, Windy, Doves, Dance Party, Etsy, Recology, San Francisco, Jordans, Lafayette, Forever, 2 Families become 1, Giants, Coral, Love, Love, Love…
Happy Friday Ya’ll!!!
So I’m crazy excited for today’s Fab Friday, featuring my good friend Julie Barro of The Happy Healthy You. Julie and I met about a month before her May wedding at an amazing woman’s networking and empowerment group we are part of, and we instantly loved each other! One of the first things I felt being in Julie’s presence was her positive, calm, and grounding energy, which is why it’s clear she’s found her calling in helping people feel the same way. As most of you know I’m not married (yet!), but I’ve always worked to put myself in my couples’ shoes (especially my brides, since most of the stress tends to fall on them), so I could try to understand the chaos and pressures of wedding planning and offer good advice for how to cope. Since Julie just went through this process recently, I naturally decided for her expertise on both surviving and thriving through wedding planning and life in general!
Thank you Julie!!!
Below is a picture from Julie & Angelo’s post wedding winery lunch that I shot and had a blast at! xo
Dearest Beautiful Bride,
Having just recently gotten married, I know how stressful and busy the time leading up to your big day can be.
I want to share a few things you can do to help you relax and get ready to enjoy the magic of the wedding weekend. We live our lives so fast that it’s incredibly important to take the time to slow down and connect to yourself. This way, you’ll be so empowered by your inner beauty that your outer beauty will radiate from within.
6 months pre-wedding: FLIRT
Yes, I recommend you start “flirting” more than ever before. Smile at strangers. Wink at bank tellers. Nod. Touch. Make eye contact and connect with everyone around you. We think about flirting as seduction but it actually just about owning your feminine power. When you connect with others around you, you feel more connected to yourself. You feel sexy and radiant. Flirting is really just about being in that place of confidence that everyone around you is better because you are in their presence. WInk. Wink. Nudge. Nudge. SMILE: You’re the beauty bride!
3 months pre-wedding: SWEAT
Move your body. When you are in your body, it’s much harder to abuse your body. Some people love yoga, some like the gym, others enjoy swimming, kick-boxing, dancing….can you find your version of pleasurable movement? Maybe it’s just dancing around your living room to your favorite song for 3 minutes. Dance it out. Sweat it out. Enjoy your life. It’s actually quite fun!
1 month pre-wedding: READ BY CANDLE LIGHT
Light candles right before you crawl into bed with your favorite book. So simple and sweet. It will help you relax and unwind at the end of each day. Beginning a ritual like this the month before your wedding will dramatically decrease your stress.
2 weeks pre-wedding: GET A MASSAGE
Have someone touch you! There is nothing that will more quickly connect you to your body and your sexiness than having an incredible massage. Not only will you feel more relaxed, the massage will also help to move stagnant energy and release stored toxins allowing you to feel totally refreshed and renewed.
1 week pre-wedding: SURRENDER
7 days until the wedding. There is only so much you can do at this point. I recommend you chose to let go of anything isn’t done at this point. When you surrender, no set backs can get you down because you know how to look for the lesson in everything. Challenges are mere detours on this amazing adventure we call life. When things don’t go according to plan, you’re just being redirected. Say thank you. You always have a choice: You can choose to let something bother you or you can choose to take a deep breath and know everything will be just find.
Weddding Day: APPRECIATE YOUR AWESOMENESS!
You are the only version of you that has even been created. The things you used to view as insecurities are actually what make you perfectly you. You are one of a kind. You have so many special qualities. You are strong. You are beautiful. You only have one precious moment on this earth…can you live it with no regrets? Remember that the next time you walk into a room. Stand in yourself! You are perfection in feminine form! Own that feeling as you walk down the aisle.
About Julie!!!
Julie Santiago is a former Wall Street trader turned Holistic Health & Happiness Coach after realizing that her health and happiness were inextricably linked. She now shows women how to step into their purpose, live life fully and play like they never have before so they can be outrageously happy. If you’re interested in any of Julie’s work, you can find more info at www.thehealthyhappyyou.com
